Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
The adults are the big ones right?
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
Randomize
