12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
im about as happy as oj after his trial
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
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