My dad just sent me a text telling me to "say hi to all the luscious bitches" at the gay bar. Guess this explains my childhood
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
Randomize