I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
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