he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
I want her autograph on my taint
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
You sat on a wall pretending to be a gargoyle before shouting "batman!" and jumping at me
I'm the drunk Des Moines deserves, but not the one it needs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
Randomize