yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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