I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
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