I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
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