She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
he high fived his dick after we had sex
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