no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
love makes seman taste better
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
You held an empty wine bottle to your head and declared yourself the "wine unicorn." For the rest of the night you galloped everywhere and whenever anyone refused to be a wine unicorn with you, you tried to spear them with the bottle.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
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