she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
[insert really romantic bullshit about how much i love you and how beautiful you are so you will suck my dick tonight]
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
It's 1 AM and there's a guy outside my house belting out Bennie and The Jets. He stops in between verses to puke. I'm joining him.
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
Randomize
