And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
