Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
the police officer looked at my vomit and told me "milk was a bad choice"
Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
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