I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
Randomize