Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize
