Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
Duck Duck Cougar?
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
Randomize
