Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
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