this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
love makes seman taste better
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
Randomize
