she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
Randomize
