Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
Randomize
