Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
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