what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Randomize
