I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
Randomize