hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
I'm experimenting with sincerity
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
Randomize
