is your mom at the bar?
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Randomize
