Her mom drove me home after I blew a .13 So there I am wishing her mom a happy mother's day sitting in the passenger seat where I just banged her daughter 15 min prior
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
