You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
At least life still wants to fuck me.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
Randomize
