I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
Randomize
