I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
Randomize
