I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
Randomize