we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
... thanks for letting me perform minor surgery on myself last night.
I figured if you were smart enough to sterilize with vodka, you could handle it.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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