So drunk its hurt
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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