If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
Randomize