I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
Randomize