We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
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