And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
Randomize
