I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
A university police officer just hhigh fived me when i drunkenly stumbled into Aderhold. Fucking 5 o'clock somewhere.ITS IN CASABLANCA RIGHT NOW! TIME ZONES!
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
Randomize
