That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
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