Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
Randomize