I heard we made out
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
I just had a girl text me from knoxville "come see me. we'll go for drinks and I can make you breakfast"
how do you like your eggs?
over tits
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
She kept calling me her DD, which I assumed meant designated driver, so I was confused because I don't even have a car. Found out later it means designated dick. It's what her and her friends use as code for the guy they want to hook up with at the end of the night. I feel so used.
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
Randomize
