So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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