wat bout pragnant strippers??
This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
So I have the hangover from hell, spent all night puking, and there's a septic tank truck parked outside the house literally pumping shit. You win God.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
I wasn't that drunk.
You were calling my cat 'Simba' and holding him up in the air.
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