Yo dont text me then not text me
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
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