Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
Randomize
