Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
I want you to know. From the bottom of my heart, that you are a great friend, a beautiful person, and one of my favorite people in this world. But if you ever send me that many messages again at 4am I swear to God, I will push you in from of a fast running rhino
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
