She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
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Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
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I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
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