Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
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