yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
Need sex. Gaining weight.
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
Things were going really well until his cousin showed up. She told him I look kind of like his mom, which started a ten-minute debate on my and his mother's specific features, and ultimately, who is prettier. Guess who my date picked.
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
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