I called you to phone bone last night, but you were out with your boring friends playing video games
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
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