I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
Just high enough for therapy.
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
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